Mother of Three Guarantees

You can guarantee that you will never get to sit down for more than 10 minutes at a time during the day.

You can guarantee that you will be needed as soon as you get on the phone.

You can guarantee that the bathroom door will fly open as soon as you get seated with pants around ankles.

You can guarantee that at least one little person will not be happy about an outing and will cry and whine the whole trip.

You can guarantee that you will never complete a meal without getting up from the table at least once (usually more) - and at least one of those times will be to wipe someone's bottom.

You can guarantee that spankings will come in groups of two - the perpetrator and the retaliator.

You can guarantee that everyone will cry or throw a tantrum at the exact same time, which will make you realize why God made women multi-taskers.

You can guarantee that by the time you get all three children down for naps, the first one down will wake up as soon as the last one goes to sleep.

You can guarantee that if one gets sick they will all be sick within 24 hours.

You can guarantee that you will get lots of hugs, kisses, smiles, and special moments that you will cherish for a lifetime.

If you know of more "guarantees" that I've missed please feel free to leave them in the comments section.